Winter is always riddled with challenges for me. Bipolar can really throw you for a loop during the season. All I really
want to do is hibernate. I want to stay up a bit later and sleep in and have quiet. But that can't happen when you have other people living in your house. Come on family can't you just disappear for a little while? Or at least close the door to the bedroom when you get up in the morning so I don't have to hear you? There should be a mute button for life. LOL Then I have to give in and get up when I hear the serenade of ducks beneath my window. They just don't understand anything but the rumble of their own bellies.
People love to talk about new beginnings this time of year, but for me it isn't the time for that. The time for new beginnings is in the spring. Right now it is cold, there's just not enough light I have to stave off anxiety and even though I started working out again and try to eat better I just want to snuggle down in my big wolf blanket to binge watch Shameless from the beginning and eat doughnuts. Wishful thinking...
My friend Deborah Newman owner of Petite Taway who created my website, prods me to write the blog. But because it is winter, there is just nothing to write about. I try to mull it over in my brain and by the time I sit down at the computer my mind has been sucked out by my son (Noah) who has to show me 1,000 videos on facebook and the mess left in the kitchen by him and his dad...I swear I just cleaned that 10 minutes ago. I looked at Luna (my service dog) and asked why he had not cleaned it up! Then it's emails, facebook, earands, phone calls, and SSI forms (Noah has autism).
By the time I get down to my studio I have to do some deep breathing.
Meditation. Relax. Block out the world ...Paint!